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Sunday
May 15,2016

Last month we talked about reasons why an open relationship might work for you. If you’ve decided to give it a try, there are a few types you can choose to try with your partner. Some of the differences between these types of relationships come down to variations on exclusivity. Remember, it’s important to communicate your needs and clearly delineate what you are both comfortable with.

 

Multi-Partner Relationships

This type of relationship occurs between 3 or more partners where a romantic and or sexual relationship can but does not need to occur between all parties involved. If you and your partner both want to have relationships with other people, this configuration of relationship might work for you. There is a non-exclusivity to this type of relationship that differentiates it from polyamorous relationships.

 

Swinging

Swingers can be single or partners in a relationship that engage in sexual relations with others as a social activity. Either partner in the open relationship can swing or the couple can swing together with the intention that others will join in.

 

Hybrid Relationships

Hybrid relationships are relationships where one member is monogamous and the other is not. In this type of relationship, the partner that is non-monogamous is able to engage in romantic and sexual relations with other people.

 

 

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  • Friday
    Apr 15,2016

    An open relationship is when two people agree to be together in a non-monogamous relationship. This means that either person can be romantically or intimately involved with other people in casual terms such as dating or longer term relationships like marriage. If you’re looking for any kind of relationship outside of your partner and you don’t want to lie about it, maybe an open relationship is the relationship for you.

     

    In Love and Don’t Want To End It

    You can fall in love with more than one person, and when it happens, it can be a cause for contention in many relationships. If you’ve fallen in love with someone else, but don’t want to end the relationship you’re already in, an open relationship may the solution you’re looking for.

     

    Needs Are Unfulfilled

    One or both partners may have needs that are not being fulfilled by the other. These needs may be intellectual or sexual. Perhaps there is a lack of companionship or similar interests. If these elements cannot be found in the relationship, finding a partner outside of the relationship can fill the void and leave everyone satisfied.

     

    Non-Monogamous by Nature

    If one or both of you are non-monogamous by nature, you want to have your cake and eat it too, why fight your natural urges? Be in an open relationship.

     

    Desire For Challenges

    Being in an open relation may cause jealousy, attachment, or possessiveness, which are all challenges for any relationship to work through. Working through these issues and openly dealing your emotions can be very satisfying and lead to greater self-awareness that strengthens your existing relationship.

     

     

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  • Saturday
    Feb 13,2016

    If you want to keep your affair under wraps, instead of going out for Valentine’s Day with your affair partner, have a night in. With all the other couples out for the evening, who knows how many unwelcome eyes and ears you could attract. Here are some small ways you can make a night in with your affair partner extra special.

     

    Gift Flowers

    Bringing flowers signals the start of a date night that’s more than just watching Netflix and ordering in Chinese. It’s a small gift that goes a long way, with bonus points awarded for knowing their favorite blooms.

     

    Make Dinner

    Nothing says old school romance like a homemade dinner and a bottle of wine. Pro tip: you can even do some practice runs of the meal with your wife or husband first. This way you’ll know exactly how to spice the meat, how long it takes to reduce the sauce, and how long it takes for dessert to set. This meal should be something personalized and delicious. Maybe it’s a version of the first meal you ever had together. Or, it’s all their favorite foods in one meal. Whether you decide to cook together or prepare it on your own, bring some music to set the mood and provide some light entertainment while dinner’s getting ready.

     

    Post Dinner Activities

    Sex. Obviously. But, if you want to warm up with something else first, you can try giving each other massages. Using massage oil makes the experience go smoother and smells amazing. Light some candles for mood lighting and put on some relaxing music. Enjoy!

     

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  • Thursday
    Nov 12,2015

    Finishing a hot and well-deserved romp with your affair partner can leave you in a haze, but never forget to cover your tracks. Here are a couple things to remember when you’re heading out or heading home after an affair.

     

    Maintain Confidentiality

    If you want to be successful at having affairs and keep your mistress secret, you need to keep it to yourself. That means you can’t tell your best friend, your office mates, or even the barista at the coffee shop near your house. No one. It doesn’t matter if it’s your friend’s-friend’s sister or that random you met at a party once. Your lips are sealed. This way, they do not have to lie for you since they don’t know.

     

    Use Protection

    Condoms, diaphrams, spermicide, and birth control. These are your new best friends. There is nothing worse than an unplanned baby or some burning-dischargey mess that will definitely get you caught.

     

    Febreeze

    Before you start your fling, begin Febreezing your car and clothes, so that the Febreeze smell becomes a regular scent for your vehicle and person. This way, when you come home from affair-sex or want to get the smell of sex out of your car, the smell of Febreeze won’t raise any suspicions.

     

    Pictures or Video

    There is nothing more stupid than taking pictures or videos of anything you do with your affair partner. This pretty much undoes everything you’ve done to cover up your tracks, because now there is actual visual evidence of your infidelity.

     

    Soap and Showering

    Whatever soap you are using at home, you need to bring extra to use for the after sex shower. If you don’t, your partner will notice the difference in smell. If you don’t have the luxury of showering after, you need to shower at home or go to the gym and then shower there.

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  • Tuesday
    Oct 13,2015

    Choosing the place to start your tryst is as important as where you finish. Keep in mind you should probably stay mostly hands off until you’re somewhere more private in case someone you know sees you. Here are some places to meet your affair partner:

     

    Concert or Show

    Going to a concert or a show is a fun and readily available entertainment choice for any cheater. These are great public places for private meetings. You can even buy your tickets separately and coordinate to be seated together. Even though it may be crowded, you will mostly be in the dark so you don’t have to worry too much about snitching eyes.

     

    Large Casino

    A large casino is a great place to meet your affair partner because there are tons of different things to do even if you don’t enjoy gambling. Many casinos have shows or concerts going on for entertainment, as well as restaurants to eat at. After dinner, you can drink at the bar or head over to the lounge for some cocktails. At a large casino there are lots of great places for some private time, because we’re sure you’ll want some of that.

     

    In the Car

    Before heading home for the night, have a quickie in the car with your affair partner. Find somewhere to park and you’re golden. Make sure to Febreeze your car so it doesn’t smell like sex in there. Or if it’s windy, you can drive with the windows down for a half hour.

     

    Cheap Motel

    Cheap motels are the place to go if you’re looking for something quick and dirty. They have your essentials: 4 walls and a bed. Also, a shower, but it’s up to you if you want to use it. While not all cities and towns have a 4+ star hotel, most of them do have cheap motels.

     

    4 Star Hotel

    A 4 star hotel is the one stop shop for cheating. Even though it may be more expensive than some of the other options, you can enjoy the facilities and activities the hotel has to offer. You can go for a swim, relax in the sauna, and let things get a little steamy in the hot tub. If you’re hungry, there’s good food and room service to take advantage of. The best part of going to a higher end hotel is that you have entertainment, food, and a place to stay the night.

     

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  • Sunday
    Sep 13,2015

    Dating profiles are a tricky thing to master. They’re essentially your calling card. If someone wants to see if you’re a potential match for them, they’ll pore over your dating profile before deciding.

     

    Don’t Put Down Online Dating

    Don’t bite the hand that feeds you. If your profile contains any “I don’t usually do this” or something that indicates you feel “online dating is sketchy” or for people who can’t find dates in real life, then no one is going to contact you. When you use these kind of statements, you make yourself seem unapproachable because you aren’t really into online dating anyway.

     

    Don’t Leave Things Blank

    If you can’t put the time in to fill out a dating profile, which is usually checking off boxes and occasionally writing a couple sentence, then it’s hard to expect other people to take the time to contact you. People are looking for legitimacy when online dating, and filling out your profile is one of the small things you can do to build that.

     

    Don’t Ramble

    On the flip side of leaving things blank, some of us are guilty of rambling. If your profile has too much information, then it won’t be given much attention either. Browse a couple of profiles to find the appropriate amount of text to include. If there is a field to type in a paragraph answer, we would recommend limiting your answer to 3-4 sentences.

     

    Don’t Overshare

    Keep in mind the people reading your profile will mostly be strangers. This means it is unwise to include any of the information regarding your home address and place of work. Similarly, your last name, phone number, or other means of contact on social media is also not a good idea. In the case you someone you haven’t met or rather not meet tries to contact you, you have the option to give them this information or keep it to yourself.

     

    Don’t Lie

    Do not lie about your age, weight, height or anything else for that matter. This will only get you into trouble, when someone you’re talking to wants to meet up or cam. There is no amount of back peddling that can fix how you’ve changed so drastically, and it will only end in disappointment for both of you. Don’t pretend you have a better job or that you’re in it for the long or short haul if you aren’t. Even if you capture someone’s interest this way, it will only be temporary unless you’re truthful.

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  • Saturday
    Aug 15,2015

    We’ve covered some basic tips for your dating profile to help you out, but it’s about time we focused a little more on how to score that first date. Good pictures, selective messaging, and asking effective questions are great things to incorporate into your online dating formula.

     

    Good Pictures

    We all know the saying a picture is worth a thousand words and in the world of online dating this has never been truer. Your photos should be recent and clearly show what you look like, because people are not going to want to meet up with someone who doesn’t even want to show their face. You should always choose quality over quantity. Having a lot of poor quality photos can do more damage than you know. It is better to have a few good pictures.

     

    Selective Messaging

    Online dating is not the same as online shopping. When you’re browsing for a new couch, you can pick out whatever you like and it can be yours. Online dating is more complicated because you’re both the shopper. Both parties have to be interested. Before you send a message to your potential date, make sure that you fit the bill for them too. Even though you could be the greatest person alive, this doesn’t automatically mean you’re the best match for them. Check to see if you’re in their desired age range, gender, and have common interests. Otherwise, you will waste time sending them a message when you could never have scored a date to begin with.

     

    Ask Questions Effectively

    Dating sites have thousands of people to choose from, which is great in theory. However, it also means that you will be competing for space in the inbox and need to grab your potential date’s attention quickly. An interesting subject line and message is an absolute must. This means you need to read their profile and see what they like. Don’t ask them what they like to do for fun or if they would interested in dating someone like you. Chances are they already filled out that information on their profile, and you have proven that you didn’t take the time to read it. What you can do is ask more specific questions about their interests. If they say they like action movies, you can ask them if they like another specific action movie.

     

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  • Thursday
    Jul 16,2015

    Lying and cheating go hand in hand. Even if you come up with the perfect plan to cheat on your spouse and you’ve gathered the courage to do it, you still need to be able to lie effectively to hide your affair. Here are couple ways to be mindful of your body language, so your affair stays under wraps.

     

    Speech Speed

    You’ve heard of liars being synonymous with quick talkers, but there’s a reason for that. Everyone’s speech speed fluctuates during speaking, but a liar’s speech will speed up or slow down within the same sentence. Usually, a liar’s speech will speed up as they figure out the lie and try to get it out as fast as possible. This means you should figure out your answer before you even start to answer, and be mindful of increases in your speed of speech for the delivery.

     

    Tripping on Words

    Keeping track of all the lies can be a tricky business. Novice liars may start-stop their sentences, or switch up and drop pronouns when trying to recount a fictitious tale. To take your lie-game to the next level, make sure you think carefully about what you’re trying to say before saying it.

     

    One Foot Out the Door

    The expression one foot out the door has some truth to it. People point their feet towards their objects of interest. So, if your partner is discussing redecorating plans for the living room with you and your feet are pointing towards the front door, you’re telling them you’ve got one foot out the door. Lying about being interested in a conversation requires more than just saying the right thing. Your body needs to do some lying too. The next time you find yourself disengaged, realign your feet to pretend like you care. Point them towards your partner or whatever objects you may be discussing.

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  • Friday
    Jun 12,2015

    The rush of forbidden acts. The longing that comes from waiting. Here are 4 ways that affair sex trumps sex with your wife or husband.

     

    Everything is new and exciting

     Just like how kids get sick of playing with the same old toys, even though they might have an old favorite, it’s hard to resist the allure of something shiny and new. With an affair partner, everything is new again. The way their body feels, the way they smell, the way they laugh. The intrigue of meeting someone new comes from the air of mystery. You don’t’ know how they are going to taste or how it feels to hold their hand. With your partner, these things are old news. The best part about having an affair partner is that they can be replaced, with some work.

     

    New places to do the dirty

    The game of cheating hearts is not for the unimaginative. Since you can’t bring your affair partner around to any place your partner might frequent, you have to get a little creative with where to meet up. Think of how great hotel sex is, and then imagine having that every time you see your affair partner. The excitement comes from having sex in a new place, and that’s pretty much all you’re doing with your new sex partner. Go on and enjoy!

     

    Explore your fantasies

    When you’re in a long and stable relationship, it can be difficult to sexually try new things, because you and your partner have likely developed some sort of routine-sex that might be pretty vanilla by now. The hard part is bringing up new things to try for fear of feeling vulnerable and being judged. When you have an affair, trying out new fantasies are often easier. In an affair, you are more carefree and that means in bed too. You can express your desires and fantasies without being worried about rejection because you’re not going to spend the rest of your life with them anyway. Give threesomes, sex games, role playing, or BDSM a try. There’s tons of ways to spice up your sex life.

     

    No emotional baggage

    Sometimes out-of-bed problems can find their way into they bedroom anyway. Problems with finance, relationship issues, or just one too kids’ birthday parties can tire you out and leave you ambivalent to having sex with your partner. Time spent away from your family and with your affair partner instead is more free and easy. You don’t have the awkwardness of your last disagreement, the everyday nagging, and the endless to-do lists looming over you. It’s no wonder the sex is better.

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  • Friday
    Aug 29,2014

    Navigating the online dating landscape can be challenging. Here are 4 things to keep in mind while you create your dating profile.

     

    1) Be Honest

    Nobody likes a liar. This rings true for the world of online dating too. There’s nothing more disappointing than falling for someone online, and meeting someone more than lackluster in person. It’s a let down and a waste of time for everybody involved. So, stick to what you know: yourself. It’s way easier to feel confident and sexy when you’re not struggling to cover up your own lies.

     

    2) Share Your Interests

    Are long walks on the beach and candle lit dinners your only interests? Well, this might not get you very far, since everyone’s riding that gravy train. There are other things that you make you unique, so play those up. Any obscure bands you might like? Any special hobbies? Or, you have travelled a lot. Tell us where! These are the things that people will find interesting, and they will automatically serve as talking points in your favor.

     

    3) Keep It Short

    Most online daters are going mobile, and bio that is an essay-long will likely be skipped. Plus, there’s plenty of time to get to know each other. It doesn’t hurt to leave some things up to the imagination.

     

    4) Show Off Your Smile

    A smile can go a long way! Pictures of you smiling or laughing show that you are fun and outgoing. People like being around happy people, so you’re more likely to snag a date this way. The number of photos is also important. Posting only 1-2 photos, might make you seem like you have something to hide. The more the merrier!

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